Children of Divorce at Christmas and Holiday Visitation

It is a frenetic time with all we have to do at Christmas. We have our own stress level to deal with and children can get a bit lost in all of this. They may be more quiet or acting out for your attention, but there are ways for all of us to thrive during this busy time. If your kids are bouncing off the walls, then do a physical activity together, possibly taking a walk around the neighborhood.

The key to this is distraction. Find some fun or relaxing distractions for you to partake in during the holidays. It may be reading a best-seller or being curled up with some special British magazines. The important idea is to have something concrete to do.

Then let your children know what this specific distraction is. Whether it is reading with your cat nearby or going out for lattes with a friend at the only coffee shop open on Christmas.  If your children know you are doing a certain activity, then they can be more relaxed and enjoy their time with the other parent.  Mine were more reluctant to leave me until I showed them my pile of magazines.  My cat just had emergency surgery early in the morning on  Christmas Eve, so I said we’d hang out together in front of the tree.

It also helps if you have a special holiday ritual to do when they return. The kids have something to look forward to do with you and be a part of your Christmas celebration, even if late in the evening.

If you take care and nurture yourself, then your tank won’t be so empty that you can’t give to others. If friends ask what you’d like for Christmas, then hint that pampering spa products would be appreciated.

Take deep breathes and bring out your bakery made quiche and desserts.  You may even enjoy a bit of pampering or me time for  when your kids are on visitation.