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Global Guide to Divorce

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DIVORCE

3 Tips on How to Deal With Divorce and Depression

Depression can be debilitating, and it can permeate every part of your life. Just getting out of bed to go to work can be a major undertaking if you’re struggling with depression. Divorce can trigger a major depressive episode that may seem endless when you’re in it.

When you’re going through a divorce, you’re dealing with grief. Except instead of the death of a person, you’re dealing with the death of a life. You have to let go of the future you planned, the lifestyle you lived, and the family you created. It’s even harder if you’re not the person who initiated the divorce. Usually the person who initiated the divorce has had time to think about it for a while, plan an exit, and mourn the life he or she lived. But the other person, who may have been taken by surprise, will have to go through those feelings, plus the shock of learning that the relationship wasn’t going as well as he or she thought. The situation is exacerbated further if your partner is keeping your child from you or is trying to turn your child against you, leading you to feel the loss of both a spouse and a child. It’s a heart-wrenching feeling and one that causes feelings of anger, sadness, and depression.

As much as you’d like to bury yourself under the covers and sleep until spring, you can’t. Your kids depend on you to keep fighting for what is right, so you have to put one foot in front of the other and make it happen.

The following are some tips on how to deal with divorce and depression.

 

Keep communication open

 

It may be difficult, but you will have to communicate with your ex-spouse in ways that you might not have been able to do so before. However, due to your ex-spouse’s malicious ways, it is best that you keep a paper trail of all communications both with your ex and your children so that nothing can be wrongly held against you. Try not to let interactions devolve into a fight, which will only add more stress and pain for your children. Speak clearly and calmly, and if it starts to become a battle, say something like, “I will speak to you about this later, when we are both calm,” and hang up. Keep trying to communicate. If communicating with your ex is too painful or just downright impossible, stay in touch with your children as much as possible via letters, emails, cards, phone calls, texts, or video chat.

 

Keep the focus on the children

 

Children take divorce very hard and often feel it’s their own fault. The fact that you are being kept from seeing your child makes it impossible for you to be able to remind them that absolutely nothing is their fault. Keep going, and let the future of being reunited propel you forward. Consider keeping a journal of all the things going on in your life so that you can share it with them once this horrible separation has passed. Show up to scheduled pick-ups even though you know deep down they won’t be there. Make it a point to never speak negatively of your ex-spouse in front of anyone, especially your children. In everything you do, show that you have the interest of your child at heart, and let cool heads prevail. You might feel like lashing out, or leaving a voicemail really letting them have it, but keep your focus on what is most important — your children.

 

Keep self-care in check

 

Your mind is consumed with your mission to once again be reunited with your family, and in doing so you may find that your emotions are all over the place. Continue to take care of yourself by eating right, including introducing mood-boosting foods to your diet like avocados, wild salmon, kale, and spinach. Find ways to exercise regularly as well. Many people find that a smartwatch can help them achieve their fitness goals and monitor progress. You can shield your device with a protective covering to ensure it doesn’t get damaged. You should also seek support for your mental health via a therapist, counselor, or trained coach like Wendi Schuller.

 

Don’t let yourself feel guilty for continuing to pursue happiness. You need to be the best version of yourself you can be for your children, and actively implementing self-care into your life is a great way to do so. It can also be a healthy distraction from the pain you are feeling, and serve as an outlet for the mixed up bottle of emotions.

 

Remember that any major loss is going to be difficult, but you can do this. Practice self-care and allow yourself some time to grieve. Keep the vision of a brighter future for you and your family at the forefront at all times to motivate you on those days when all hope seems lost, because it isn’t.

 

 

How to Recover Financially After Divorce?

Divorce has an impact on many elements of your life, including your emotions and finances. It might have an effect not only on your disposable income but also on your credit and other assets. Use these five tips to improve your finances after your divorce.

 

  • Examine Your Credit

 

When going through a divorce, one of the first activities you should do is get a credit record from one of the main credit reporting agencies. Obtaining a credit report and determining your credit score may appear to be a daunting undertaking, but it will only benefit you in the long run. In addition, this can assist you to figure out how much effort you’ll need to accomplish to recover.

 

Severing financial connections with your spouse can significantly impact your credit, but fortunately, rebuilding your credit can be rather simple. Paying off any outstanding debts and making sure your payments are paid on time are the two simplest strategies to improve your credit. In addition, you should aim for a credit score of at least 700, as this will allow you to obtain loans and credit cards without paying excessive interest rates. Lenders view you as less risky if you have a better credit score.

 

  • Make a Budget

 

Setting a budget is one of the initial things you should do after finalising your divorce. Most of the time, you’re going from a two-income to a single-income household. Salary disparities can have a major influence on your discretionary money. Setting a budget is a simple process that can have a significant impact on your overall economic well-being.

 

To start, write a list of all your costs, whether they are basic necessities such as electricity and housing or alimony and child support. Then, each month, you should keep a detailed record of all your recurrent spending. After you’ve outlined all of your costs, figure out how much money you’ll need to cover them all.

 

The next stage in constructing the perfect budget is to figure out how much money you make each month. Now, take your total revenue and subtract your total costs; the remaining money should be divided in half. Half of your money should go into savings accounts, while the other half can be utilised for fun or other non-essential purchases. This can help you turn your financial condition around on its own. In addition, having sums set aside for monthly costs and savings will help you avoid overspending.

 

  • Identifying Your Assets and Transferring Them Into Your Name

 

Identifying your assets is a critical step in the process of divorce. Trying to figure out what comes to you, what belongs to your spouse, and what belongs to both of you might appear to be a difficult task. However, depending on the state you live in, it is actually quite straightforward.

 

First, determine if the assets were purchased using individual or shared funds. Anything purchased with a personal credit card or cash belongs to the individuals. The tricky part is making joint purchases. In most cases, combined purchases include houses and other large-cost products.

 

Fortunately, the Court will assist you in determining who receives whose assets. Once you’ve determined which assets are yours, it’s critical to transfer them into your own name. Your net worth is directly affected by your assets, which might help you qualify for other forms of financial assistance in the future, such as private lines of credit.

 

  • Close shared accounts and open new ones in your name.

 

The next stage in cutting financial ties with your ex-partner is to shut joint banking accounts and create new accounts with your own name, which is similar to splitting and shifting assets into your own. This will not only assist you in cutting financial links with each other, but it will also assist you in protecting your money during the process of divorce.  When creating new bank accounts, make sure to send this information to your divorce lawyer to protect the safety of your funds.

Ensure you do your study on banks to guarantee you’re getting the most value for the money. Each bank has its own set of benefits and drawbacks. Banks with no fees are something you should seek for. Some banks even go so far as to waive credit checks in order to give you a second opportunity at banking. As already stated, divorce may negatively influence your credit, so finding a bank that offers a second opportunity at banking can be quite useful in decreasing financial stress.

 

  • Make a safety net or an emergency fund.

 

Finally, once you’ve created your own accounts, it’s a good idea to set aside money for a safety net or an emergency fund. We recommend that you open a second savings account at a different bank and have a percentage of your paycheck put directly into it. Opening a bank account at a different bank makes it significantly more difficult to get your money; this reduces the incentive to use it. It doesn’t have to be a significant sum of money, but simply putting away $10 to $20 per paycheck will assist ensure that you have some funds set aside for “just in case” situations.

 

With the stress of divorce, it may be very tempting to neglect the small things in life, such as your financial well-being. However, financial stress is unavoidable after a divorce, but several options and services are available to assist you in getting back on track and improving your financial health. We hope you find these money-saving suggestions useful and that you recover soon once your divorce is finalised.

 

Bio-

 

Suppose you find yourself at the crossing point of separation and divorce later in life. In that case, it is critical to seek the best advice from the Divorce Lawyers Gold Coast, who can help you navigate that new path and safeguard your financial and emotional well-being as you enter the best years of your life and start riding into the sunset. Working with a qualified Lawyer Gold Coast. can also allow you to settle your divorce finances without having to go to court saving you a lot of money and mental distress.

 

Simple Steps For Choosing The Right Family Law Attorney For You In Houston Or World-Wide

Before you make an informed decision, it’s better to do thorough research not only on the web but also by visiting such a certain law firm from which you wish to have your lawyer.

You have to get one of the best to litigate your case and give your priority the most efficient response required, thus you need to choose smartly too.

Once you secure leads for certain lawyers, you can compare them with a divorce attorney Houston, or for divorce matters you can consider a divorce lawyer, Houston to ensure you have chosen the right person and are ready to get a legal go with such a person in the long run.

Conducting candidate interview  

It is one of the best ways to assess how much a lawyer would be helpful to you and it can be done by taking his or her interview.

This is also done to find out how the lawyer speaks of you, what are his or her ways to argue, and gives a proper idea to find out his or her litigate terms also.

Most attorneys do provide prior or the first consultation with no charge, and below are few questions that can be asked:  

  • What experience does the lawyer have in the type of legal matter?
  • How long have they been in practice?
  • What is their track record of success?
  • How much percentage of their expertise focuses on your legal problem?
  • Any special skills or certification they do have?
  • What is their common fee and how it’s structured?
  • Do they carry malpractice insurance? If so, how much?
  • Do they ask for subordinates? If yes, what are their rates?
  • Any outsourcing they do to cover key legal functions?
  • Any additional cost involved apart from lawyer’s fees?
  • In how many separate sessions you have to be billed?
  • Any references to provide from other clients?
  • Do they have any written fee or represent an agreement
  • How will they inform you on the development of your case?

Decisions to choose  

Do keep in mind that higher fees don’t mean you have been attained with a more qualified attorney and a rock bottom fee can also signal problems, inexperience, or even incompetence.

After interviewing the lawyer, thus here are these few questions you should ask yourself to confirm the person to litigate:

  • Is the lawyer experience and strength compatible with your legal need?
  • Did they provide prompt and polite responses to your questions?
  • Are they, someone, with whom you feel comfortable?
  • Are you confident that they possess the skill to handle your case?
  • Are you happy with fees and the way they are structured?
  • Are you also comfortable with terms of fee and representation agreement? 

If you are still not happy with such legal professionals, you can consider a Family law attorney, Houston for family matters, and in case of divorce, you can ask for a Divorce lawyer, Houston and the services you will get would surely help you in a much better response.

Ask other attorneys  

Lawyers are mostly familiar with the skills of other lawyers, certain attorneys can assist you with information on others that you may not be able to find in a book or even online. Such information may comprise legal ethics, legal manners, practice habits, and competence that can play a big role to choose any lawyer in Houston. It’s better to have a piece of advice from an attorney on what type of lawyer you want and it would help to sort out your problems around.

Conducting a background check

Before hiring a lawyer, it’s also essential that you contact a legal disciplinary agency to find the lawyer’s standing in the bar. Further, also review the legal disciplinary agency through online listings that would be easily available on the web directory and find how much it’s active.

You must need to check references, especially in case you have hired an attorney through the web, and also consider peer rating reviews on such cases before hiring. Peer review raiding provides the legal ethics and standard of an attorney generated through evaluation by other legal members and standing personnel within the United States and Canada and should reflect the ultimate status.

Touring the lawyer’s office  

A lawyer’s office would lastly give you a very brief idea how he or she deals all things, so request them a tour and it should be beyond the place where you met like a conference room and your tour should be of the entire place.

Consider these factors, while you are on a visit:  

  • Is the law office efficient, well-arranged, neat, and smoothly runs?
  • What kind of support staff does the lawyer employ?
  • Does the staff appear friendly and helpful?
  • Is the lawyer’s office local and easily accessible?
  • Is a large space of his office unoccupied?

Finally watch for red flags like mass dismay, unhappy staff, and large empty portions to be filled.

Conclusion  

This is how you can choose any  Houston family law attorneys for handling your family matters and you need to choose them carefully. Make sure you ask sharp questions, get polite responses and solve it all within your reach to settle it out and you will get a perfect lawyer for yourself.

 

Different Types of Evidence that Can Be Used in a Divorce Case

Divorce cases can be possible in certain conditions, there are a variety of elementary positions that can consider them, but nothing in a legal way or even in court stands a chance if there is no evidence involved, and that matters the most even for divorce cases.

there are different type of evidence that can be involved, financial statements, checks or balances or written bills, or even statements of contentions, but they all have their own priority and can only be asked according to the arguments and litigation happening in court and you need to consider how to decide such different type of divorce-related evidence that can make a difference.

It’s not that experts are not available, there are persons who can help you how to choose and collect strong evidence, and for that, you can connect to divorce lawyer Rock Hill who are experts in the field, can let you know how to separate in between single evidence and a strongly procured evidence, and help build your case too.

Also for any spouse related case, especially after marriage to part ways, a prenuptial agreement is essential to discuss, and for that matter Prenuptial agreement lawyers, Spartanburg can be handy who know all about it, would let you know how much compensation you can get as a single person, and this would surely make your life better even after separating as a couple too.

Before you start to collect all important documents and decide that they can play a vital role to prepare your divorce case, its essential to consider disclosure sheet where you mention such evidence, and there are few things to sharply consider in that matter, which may include:

  • Choosing the evidence carefully that is acceptable
  • Not to get a slip with mentioning too many subjects
  • To clearly mention the state of contention
  • And to ensure that you have mentioned legal documents that precede divorce

If you can consider these few things in your priority to proceed with collecting evidence and help them make a strong divorce case, then it can become more prudent compared to just starting to collect documents and decide whether they would work or not.

Financial documents  

The first set of evidence that matter in court or even to discuss with lawyers has to be financial documents, and they may include:

  • Bills on shared income if any from the past 3 years
  • Monetary spending by the couple for specific purposes
  • Spending done for the child if any or if more than 1 or 2
  • All type of earning, borrowing bills, or credit cards used as a couple

And this is what it stands for as evidence in court to consider a strong divorce case, and if you can prepare them, it would surely help to convince both lawyer and the court.

Statements of contention  

The other thing that matter to be essential is statements of contention, saying something is not enough and you may require written documents, which may include:

  • Main contention to go for divorce
  • Statements on home arguments, financial dialogue, or other factors if any
  • Documents that state divorce due to lack of security
  • Statement related to better future of child for which divorce is needed

This is how it works in the form of statements of contentions and if they are strongly put as written documents and approved, then the lawyer can help you proceed for a strong divorce case to handle and fix it properly.

Official legal documents  

This is one another form of evidence that has its own value, and it does involve some legal terms to consider before a couple of part ways that may include:

  • Compensation agreed to in prenuptial agreement signed before the marriage
  • Any other legal contract working in current in between the couple that has to be clarified
  • Legal formalities of documents that state proceeding of divorce
  • Confidential legal statements including disclosure sheet, financial testimony, and other written documents to consider

And these are few legal pieces of evidence that stand upon when it comes to consider a divorce case and decide the proceeding or further elementary step on the gas for it to happen to separate a couple into 2 separate beings.

Conclusion

Still, if you have questions on how evidence is collected, what is an elementary process and whether there may be any more type that can be considered, it’s better to connect with family law attorneys  Spartanburg, discuss your case and they will help you to prepare it all in a much better way.

 

Grief May Surprise You After Divorce Or A Break Up

One may think they are over their relationship or got past divorce and later feel the loss. Grief can sneak up on you and catch you by surprise. It is like swimming in calm waters and a big wave comes up and slaps you hard. It takes time to mourn a marriage or love interest. One day you are fine and the next in tears. It can be lonely at first.  Grief comes in stages and one can move back and forth between them.

Denial

This is avoiding the situation. Pretending that things are not happening. Not dealing with reality, such as thinking if you do not hire an attorney, then the divorce will not happen. Or he/she will come to their senses and stay with you. It is delusional thinking. Denial may be manifested as carrying on as usual with the same routines as if nothing is happening.

Anger

This is when a person realizes denial is not stopping the divorce or a break up. The other person is firm, “It is over.” They have collected any personal belongings at your place and have dropped off yours.  In a divorce situation, it is no longer possible to deny the divorce is happening.   Papers are served. The other party’s attorney has contacted you or perhaps a court date has been set. One is furious that their life is in such an upheaval. Anger can have one reacting instead of responding. Reacting is impulsive and not thinking with a clear head.

Anger can lead to revenge – such as using the children as weapons. Too often in the news, a parent kills the children in a divorce situation to get back at the other one. It can be trashing a spouse’s reputation on social media.

Bargaining

It is hoping that if you change your behavior then the divorce or break up will be stopped. One may try and make a deal with the other person.  “I can change.  I won’t do (whatever annoyed them) anymore.” Or with a marriage, “I will agree to a divorce if we go to a weekend retreat to try and patch up our relationship.”

Being in the bargaining stage is acknowledging the situation which is not done in the denial stage. It is moving along in the grief process. It is wishing for a miracle to happen.

Depression

Depression in grief is not the same as the chronic clinical one. Rather, it is numbness. Feeling as if stumbling around in slow motion. There may be brain fog or lethargy. The body is worn out from having the strong surge of emotions from earlier in the divorce process. These ranged from shock, panic to despair. It can be a time to take a pause and nurture yourself. The stress hormones, such as cortisol, have flooded one’s body. This quieter time can be a way to chill out and regroup.

Acceptance

This last stage might come during the proceedings or a bit later. One has come to terms with what happened – no longer being married. When it is a break up, finally realizing that person is no longer in your life.  One acknowledges the loss and begins to look ahead to the future. A new chapter is opening in life which can include changing careers or relocation. Taking up new challenges and hobbies. It is a time of exploration – whether it is a self-assessment or travel to enticing destinations. Time to start a new chapter in your life. Many of us change careers.

This is based on my article published in the Divorce Magazine out of Toronto.

10 Signs it Might be Time to Talk to a Divorce Attorney

Marriages are complex relationships that have ups and downs. According to the APA, 40 to 50 % of husband and wife in the United States takes divorce. This complicates the choice to divorce. In today’s post, we’ll go over some of the most typical warning signs that your marriage is on the verge of divorce, as well as when it’s appropriate to contact Divorce Lawyers Toowoomba

 

1.    You’re getting into a lot of fights.

 

Disagreements may be a good aspect of a marriage if they are used to negotiate and grow. Unfortunately, harmful behaviour such as blaming, name-calling, and even emotional or physical violence may occur during fights. If your disputes with your spouse are becoming increasingly heated, it may be time to explore a change.

A famous relationship researcher, John Gottman, discovered that he could predict if a couple will divorce with 93 per cent accuracy. According to him, it all boils down to four behaviours: criticism, defensiveness, disdain, and defensiveness.

 

If these activities are normal in your relationship and you’ve tried and failed to prevent them, it’s an indication that your marriage is on the verge of falling apart.

 

2.  Your children are suffering as a result of this.

 

Children are extremely sensitive, particularly when it comes to the persons in their life who are the most precious to them. For many couples who are unhappy in their relationships, it takes a detrimental influence on their children for them to recognise it is time to make a change. If your child has observed several conflicts between you and your partner, you may want to consider the influence of watching this conflict on them.

It has been shown that, in certain cases, children’s emotional well-being increases after their parent’s divorce.

According to one research, 82 per cent of children who have suffered family breakdowns would desire that their parents divorce if they are unhappy. Most parents want to model good relationships for their children; if yours has been less-than-healthy recently, it may be time to consider the next step.

 

3.  Your self-esteem has collapsed.

 

Is your spouse supportive and appreciative of your greatest attributes, or is he or she critical of you? Everyone has the right to feel comfortable about themselves, particularly in the context of their marriage.

Even if you feel valued by your partner, persistent disagreement inside a relationship can sometimes make people feel inadequate to live up to the standards of a healthy marriage. If your self-esteem has recently suffered, it might be a sign that you are not in the ideal relationship.

 

4.  Your values are the opposite.

 

Perhaps you had huge aspirations before you married, but they died out when you found your partner didn’t share them. It’s also normal for couples to admit their differences at first and then expect they’ll ultimately get on the same page; perhaps this was the case in your relationships, and you couldn’t meet in the middle.

Opposite thinking and values, regardless of the situation, may produce a lot of difficulties in a relationship and make it difficult to imagine a future together. If you want a large family but your partner does not want children, you may find it difficult to reconcile your opposing desires.

This may be a good moment to take a step back and consider whether you’re prepared to compromise in order to continue in your relationship.

 

5.   The negatives overshadow the positives.

 

A hard patch is one thing; every partnership goes through them from time to time. On the other hand, if you constantly feel as if a dark cloud is hovering over your marriage, you may want to reconsider. Which issue is more complicated when you list the positives and negatives of your relationship? Approach this with a cool mind and evaluate recent life events and challenges that may be affecting your relationship right now.

 

6.   You two have grown apart.

 

Sometimes partners begin life on the same road but wind up with opposing ambitions. “You either evolve together, or you grow away,” as the phrase goes. If you and your partner don’t have the same connection you did when you first met, it might cause big problems in your relationships.

The emotional distance between couples can make communicating your wishes and needs to each other challenging. To make matters worse, a lack of communication has regularly been identified as one of the leading reasons for divorce. If you and your partner feel as if you are no longer communicating with each other, you may want to consider divorce seriously.

 

7.  You’ve made changes, but nothing has changed.

 

Many couples give counselling a go before calling it quits. Some people also strive to make small changes in their everyday lives that will make them both happier. If you believe you’ve done everything and nothing has strengthened your relationship, it might be a sign that you’ve exhausted all choices and should contemplate divorce. Nobody wants to remain miserable for the rest of their lives; you have to draw the line someplace.

 

8.   A Partner is Having an Extramarital Affair

 

For some people, infidelity means the end of a marriage. They are unable to forgive their partner for having an affair. Some couples can overcome infidelity and maintain a devoted relationship.

If your partner wants to be with the individual, the marriage is gone. It is a clear indication that it’s time to talk to a divorce attorney.

 

9.   Trust Issues

 

Another pillar of a happy marriage is trust. You must have faith in your spouse to remain faithful and make decisions that are in the family’s best interests. It might be difficult to reestablish trust if your spouse refuses to accept his or her role in losing it.

Trust is supported with respect. It may be tough to sustain a marriage if your partner does not appreciate you. Because of a lack of trust and respect, you may struggle with a variety of difficulties, including investment choices, child-raising decisions, and job choices.

 

10.   Intimacy is lacking.

 

A lack of emotional and physical closeness indicates a developing loss of interest in the relationship. It might be a sign that your partnership is in danger if you feel more like roommates than two individuals in love.

 

Taking the Next Move

 

When you begin to explore divorce, you should speak with a family divorce attorney who can clarify your alternatives. If you have a cooperative partner, you may have a Friendly Divorce and guarantee that each partner’s financial and emotional requirements are fulfilled. It’s critical to find a family law attorney that listens to you and advocates for your rights so you can feel like your old self again in no time.

 

Bio-

 

If you are considering divorce, information is critical in determining how to proceed. Family Lawyers in Toowoomba provides a 100% private, no-obligation, fixed-fee first consultation with Divorce Lawyers in Toowoomba to discuss your case and explore your choices. If you need our help preparing for a divorce, please contact us, and we will gladly lead you through the procedure at your pace.

 

How To Choose The Right Mediator For Your Case

When disputants devote time and effort in selecting the best mediator for their case, the return is more than simply getting a professional and experienced mediator — the fact that the selection is made by mutual consent may generate a collaborative environment before

Finding the best mediator for your situation is the first and most crucial step in the mediation procedure. You want a highly qualified mediator with expertise in Family law mediation and a style necessary for the conflict and the individuals involved.the official mediation ever begins.

 

Do I require the services of a lawyer?

An attorney is not always required for effective mediation. A skilled mediator will grasp the situation based on the pre-mediation statements (if they are utilized) and know how to maintain the conversations fair.

 

If you currently have an attorney or plan to employ one, ask her to assist you in selecting a mediator. Many attorneys are mediators or are well-versed in the mediation options offered in their field of practice. The presence or absence of your attorney at the mediation should be discussed prior to the mediation.

 

Factors to Consider When Finding a Mediator

 

      1.    Allow the Other Party to Choose

 

Although it may appear to be a compromise before even beginning the mediation, allowing the opposing side to select the mediator gets the mediation process started in the correct direction.

For starters, it demonstrates that you are prepared to compromise and are genuinely interested in reaching an agreement. Second, while the mediator is discussing your viewpoint with the other party and, ideally, trying to persuade them in your favour, the mediator already has authority with the opposing party since they picked him or her as their mediator.

Finally, though mediation aims to solve the issue, it is crucial to realize that if you do not agree with the mediator’s stance during the mediation process, you are not required to settle the matter. Mediation is not legally binding, and there is no need to agree on a date for the mediation. If the mediator appointed by the opposing party fails, subsequent attempts, maybe with a new mediator, may be productive. 

 

      2.   Background of the Mediator

 

Despite the fact that it is normal to acquire CVs and other background information from experts at trial, parties sometimes fail to collect the same information about the mediator. Based on the type of case, it is critical to collect whatever information the mediator may have on his technical knowledge and/or familiarity with the complexity of your case. It is also helpful to know whether the mediator has previously practised or is now practising as a plaintiff and/or defence attorney, as well as the jurisdiction in which he or she mainly operates.

The mediator can be more convincing if he or she is familiar with the jurisdiction and the individuals involved, including the prospective jury pool and judges. It is critical to understand whether the mediator is familiar with the subjects that will be discussed, such as construction, healthcare, or appellate difficulties. A mediator who is aware and skilled about such issues can only help the case to be resolved.

 

      3.   Flexibility

 

While many mediators have a precise formula for mediation scheduling, it is critical that a mediator be creative and willing in terms of how medications can best be managed on an individual basis.

A mediator who is open to recommendations and prepared to listen to the parties about waiving opening statements or even the positioning or position of the parties around an office is vital and might be the difference between a good mediation and a failed mediation.

 

      4.   Follow-through

 

Many mediations fail to resolve their issues on the scheduled mediation date. It is critical to understand and consider how frequently the mediator resolves cases in the weeks or even months after the original mediation. Mediators who phone (and/or harass) both sides after the mediation date are typically quite efficient.

These mediators demonstrate that they sincerely care about their success rate as mediators and do not think that their job ends on the mediation day.

 

      5.   Recommendations

 

Word of mouth is a great approach to get recommendations for mediators who are most suited to a particular situation. While the lawyer handling the matter may have some ideas for a mediator, information obtained at trade meetings, industry meetings, and even from rivals might lead to the names of mediators recognized by others in the sector. It is critical to keep your ears open at all times and to inquire of people about positive experiences they may have had with particular mediators.

 

      6.   Respect

 

Finally, the most critical criterion to consider when selecting a mediator is that all parties appreciate the mediator. For example, suppose a person of the court retires and has become a mediator, and you didn’t obey him when he was on the court. In that case, you are unlikely to be susceptible to his powers of persuasion when he discusses your case. If, on the other hand, the mediator has been recommended by one of your respected colleagues and arrives with a good recommendation (or better yet, a few strong references), mediation is more likely to succeed.

 

Final Words

 

The advantage of choosing the right mediator for your case goes beyond simply finding a professional and experienced mediator; the fact that the choice is made by mutual consent has a beneficial psychological effect in generating a collaborative environment before the actual mediation process even begins. The selecting process will need some time and work, but it will be well worth it. Remember to make informed decisions!

 

Bio-

 

At Family law mediation Australia, we are careful about our Mediators’ expertise and competencies. Each team member is a certified family lawyer with extensive expertise in both family law issues and mediation. Our mediators are all nationally accredited and certified Family Dispute Resolution Professionals.

5 Steps to Entrepreneurship for Stay-at-Home Moms

For single, recently divorced mothers, figuring out how to balance work with childcare is challenging. Maybe it’s time to consider starting your own home-based business. And with a little support from Wendi of Global Guide to Divorce, you’ll feel confident about becoming a “mompreneur!” If you’re interested in opening a home-based business, these tips will help you in every step of the process.   

Come Up With a Business Idea  

Naturally, deciding on your business idea should be the first item on your to-do list! Frugal Budgeter recommends thinking about possibilities like becoming a bookkeeper, a proofreader, a social media manager, or even selling arts and crafts.

You’ll also need to decide how you want to price your products or services. To determine how much you’ll charge, consider your own fixed expenses, the cost of any materials you’ll need, and what your time is worth based on your previous income from W2 jobs.   

Hire Freelance Help   

As a business owner and stay-at-home single mom, you’re inevitably going to have a lot on your plate — but you don’t have to handle all of your entrepreneurial responsibilities on your own! Instead, you can hire freelance experts for help.

For instance, you could work with a freelance web designer to set up your company website or a social media manager to outline a digital marketing plan. And rather than trying to design a logo on your own, you can hire a graphic designer — to illustrate, freelance graphic designer pricing is approximately between $15 and $35 per hour. To find a graphic designer (or any other freelancer, for that matter), you can browse online job platforms and check out reviews, estimated delivery times, and rates before hiring someone.

What if you also need support navigating your divorce and getting back on your feet? You can turn to Wendi Global Guide for Divorce for coaching!  

Start Networking   

Now, you’re ready to work with your first clients or customers! But how can you land those initial sales? The secret is networking. As a new entrepreneur, you need to get the word out about your business! Startup Nation recommends joining groups with other professionals in your industry. If attending networking events in person with your kids in tow would be tough, you can connect with virtual groups instead.  

Working From Home With Kids  

When you’re running a business and raising a family at the same time, it’s easy to feel overwhelmed. To stay productive while working from home with your kids, Healthline recommends picking out a few quieter activities that your kids can do during the workday, sticking to a regular schedule for the household, and aiming to get more work finished while the kids are napping. If your kids spend time with their other parent as part of your custody agreement, you can also plan to get extra work done during those days. Hiring a babysitter on your busiest days is also an option.  

Bring an Assistant on Board   

If you need a hand with your business, you may want to hire a virtual assistant to help you stay on top of everything you need to do, freeing up more time for you to spend with your kids! To find a reliable assistant, you should look for someone who has fantastic attention to detail, the ability to multitask effectively, great writing skills, and basic accounting skills.

After a divorce, it can take some time to move forward in your personal and professional life. If you’re staying home with your children for the foreseeable future, starting your own business can give you a new goal and a sense of fulfillment. With these tips, you’ll be prepared to succeed as a “mompreneur!”

Are you trying to navigate life after a divorce? You’re not alone, and the resources from Global Guide to Divorce can help you make it through. Reach out to Wendi for a coaching session today.

Author Kelli Brewer is proud of her military family and is passionate in supporting military families. Together with her husband, they created DeployCare to offer understanding and support to our service members and their families before, during, and after deployments.

 

How to Make Remote Work Possible With a Baby or Toddler at Home

Over the last year, more and more people have had to transition to learning how to work remotely. Even as COVID-19 cases have been reduced, the odds are good that many parents are working out of a home office for the time being. Although remote work limits your risk of spreading the coronavirus, it’s also a major productivity challenge all on its own. Add a very little one to the mix, and things can get hectic, fast.

However, there are ways you can keep your cool, stay productive, eliminate household stress, and manage your household all at once. Wendi’s Tips shares some of the best techniques working parents can use to get through the next few months with their sanity intact.

Dress for Comfort

When you’re taking care of a little one, you’re on the go a lot. Parents of young children spend a lot of time kneeling down, playing on the ground, and chasing after budding crawlers and walkers. If you don’t have access to child care, this is still going to be true while you’re working remotely. The fact that you’re also going to be juggling work is only more reason to focus on wearing comfy clothes.

Now, we’re not saying you should stay in your pajamas all day — that’s not the world’s best look on video calls. However, split the difference with comfortable, fashionable items. You can get yourself a whole cozy remote work wardrobe without spending too much if you keep your eye out for sales at shops like Dillards. This can be an especially good move for new moms — elastic waistbands are your friend for those first few months.

Get Help If Possible

Depending on your situation, you may be able to ask a local friend or family member to bubble up with you and be a dedicated babysitter. Your parents, siblings, or close friends might be willing and able to take this on for you. Have a clear open conversation about what level of quarantine and self-isolation everyone wants out of the bubble. It’s important to be on the same page in order to make sure no one inadvertently crosses a line.

However, we understand that this won’t be feasible for everyone. If you can’t find anyone who can bubble with you, you might still be able to get a little bit of babysitting out of interested loved ones. For example, you can look into setting a friend up as your virtual babysitter. This works by setting your child up with a video chat with the friend or family member in question. It’s not a perfect solution — you definitely still need to be in the room so you can keep your little one safe — but they can hold your child’s attention while you knock out a task or two. Remember, video chats are thought to be a healthy, productive form of screen time!

Ask for Flexibility

At the end of the day, your best bet over the next few months might be asking for flexibility at work. For example, you might ask if, apart from meetings, you can work during non-traditional work hours. If you have a partner who also works from home, see if you can organize it so one of you works earlier than the traditional 9–5 and the other, later. This will give both of you more time to dedicate your full attention to your child or your work, rather than try to split it between both.

Enhance Your Career Prospects  

Now that you’re working remotely, have you considered giving your career a boost? Online degree programs allow you to complete your coursework from home and work at a pace that you can adapt to your family obligations. There are all sorts of online programs available, including those with degrees for business, teaching, nursing, and accounting.

These aren’t the only options, so go into the conversation with an open mind and a few ideas for what might work. You and your supervisor can collaborate to come up with a solution that works for your family and your team. Remember — this is all temporary. Come up with a plan for the next few months, and try to take things one day at a time. Soon, this will all be behind you.

Author Janice Russell believes the only way to survive parenthood is to find the humor in it. She created Parenting Disasters so that parents would have a go-to resource whenever they needed a laugh, but also to show parents they aren’t alone. She wants every frazzled parent out there to remember that for every kid stuck in a toilet, there’s another one out there somewhere who’s just graced their parents’ walls with some Sharpie artwork!

Why Playfulness Is Important

Playfulness is a way to reduce stress and get through the minutia and tasks required during  stressful times, such as divorce. Besides helping life to be more bearable when juggling proceedings, children and a job, a sense of playfulness lowers anxiety. Being in a calmer state is beneficial for making those crucial decisions regarding splitting assets and so forth.

There are various studies on the benefits of playfulness in getting through adversity (such as divorce) and contributing to longevity. Dr Proyer from the University of Zurich has done much research on adult playfulness and states these individuals cope better with stress and being able to adapt to situations. One study found that playfulness increased one’s well-being and resilience. When I was a nurse on a busy trauma unit, most of us were burned out with patients hovering between life and death. The two playful nurses who wadded up paper to bat around like a ball, were not. In-between patient codes and procedures, these fellows made up games and were the most relaxed nurses on the unit.

Professor Barret at University of Illinois also found that playful folks are better able to handle stress. These individuals perceived their stress levels to be lower, than the less playful subjects in the study. When people are playful, they have better strategies to deal with stress according to her research. Mistakes are more likely to be viewed as learning opportunities rather than as blunders.

Consider the advantages to having a playful outlook during divorce. One is better able to utilize coping strategies during this stressful time and less likely to fall apart. A person can take a pause from proceedings and be engrossed in pleasurable activities. Playing lets out some steam and enables one to see the humorous side of life. Children benefit by being around laughter and spontaneity instead of glum parents.

Playfulness improves cognitive, emotional and social functioning as was reported In the American Journal of Play, Summer 2011 edition. Good mental (cognitive) functioning is necessary when going through finances and deciding whether to sell the marital home or buy out one’s spouse during divorce. Other studies found that playful folks draw people to them. They are open, fun to be around, engaging and positive. Being able to connect with others and have a network of support enables one to move through the craziness of divorce. Being bitter and negative post-divorce can push people away.

An example of the longevity benefits of playfulness are the elderly Chinese in Beijing. These senior citizens were dancing to the music from their boom boxes, doing Tai Chi, playing board games, plus more. They laughed, indulged in badminton and chatted. They clearly enjoyed their time together and were extremely active physically and mentally. There were no wheelchairs or walkers in that group. This contrasts to a divorced woman I knew in the States, who was anything but playful and died of a heart attack.

I was at Disneyland with my sons when I decided to initiate divorce. I called family and friends between rides on Snow White, Mr. Toad’s Wild Adventure and Indiana Jones. I was forced to be playful in this atmosphere and that started my divorce in a much more relaxed way. Figuring out finances was less stressful when standing in line for The Haunted Mansion. My sons were relieved that divorce was about to happen. Disneyland set the tone for keeping playfulness throughout my divorce.

There are ways to be more light-hearted during proceedings. Plan at least one weekly get-together with pals to vent or catch up on news. Having support helps to lighten your burden. Spend time in nature which is calming, even if in a small leafy city square. My sons and I watched comedies and laughed a lot. Go to a fair and act like a kid. Get out of town to spend a day walking along the beach and enjoying the amusements on the boardwalk. My mother took my sons and I on a river cruise during divorce, which was approved by both of our attorneys. That took our minds off the divorce and into the play mode. Think of how to inject some fun into your agenda on a regular basis, and divorce will go a bit smoother.

My article was originally printed in DivorceForce   www.divorceforce.com/

Tips On How To Set Priorities During Divorce

How to set priorities when too many things are bombarding you at once?  Divorce is a time when one can be scattered.  Too many decisions requiring immediate attention. You may feel like you are on a roller coaster speeding along over the ups and downs. How to stop this craziness and get back on track? Set priorities. How to get started?

Make A Check List

What is your most important issue or concern? Or your top fear? For many, it could be housing. “Do I have to vacate the marital home with the children?” When finances are uncertain, the question may be “Will I have to move house in a hurry without Plan B?”

Write down whatever it is. Underneath that, list any resources or ways which you can deal with this issue. You might surprise yourself with options which had not occurred to you before. This is an example, with housing. Temporarily move in a relative’s spare room. Or at a nominal cost, take the bedroom of your empty nester friend whose offspring is doing a gap year abroad. Be creative and think outside of the box when coming up with solutions.

Do the same with the lesser issues. A check list of what is bothering you and what you can do about it helps you to get organised. You feel more in control of your divorce situation when brain storming and coming up with ideas.

What Needs To Be Done First?

Determine what are the most important tasks. Rather than attempting to accomplish many things at once, focus on what needs to be done first. Then second, third and so forth. What is urgent (getting financial records together) and what is less so (deciding which pieces of furniture you would like to get).

Rather than being like a squirrel who goes off the path to check out each shiny object – stay on the path. You can notice each shiny object, just do not get distracted and go after each one. Stay on the path and finish the task you are doing. Yes, task #2, #3, #4 have to be done. Concentrate on which one has the most importance and then go down the list.

Feeling Scattered

During divorce, you may find that your attention wanders. You feel scattered. At work, focus on your job tasks, not on splitting assets. When out with friends, enjoy their company. Focus on what activity you are doing, not on what needs to be done next week. This helps to keep you grounded.

Setting Goals

Part of setting priorities is determining your goals. What is a realistic outcome in your divorce? What is it that you want the most? Is it the house? Pension plan? Think about what your priority is when dividing assets – your main goal. Discuss this with your solicitor.

What are your other goals, such as with co-parenting? Is it that the children go to a day school or to a boarding school? Maybe it is that you both live in the same city and not across the UK from each other. It is easier to get details worked out during the divorce process than to take legal action at a later date.

Personal Priorities

Are you feeling stretched in many directions? Go over personal priorities in your life. What is important? What drains your energy?  This is the time to start saying “No, sorry I can’t” a bit more often. You may have to let go of some commitments in order to have time for what is most dear to you.

Do you want to spend more time relaxing with the kids at home? You may have to cut down on socialising to achieve this. Not cut it out, but rather making adjustments. Some people give so much to others that they feel exhausted. Take care of yourself first in this stressful time.

If you are doing too much, what tasks can be delegated at home and at work? Children can pitch in and do more chores. My sons learned how to do their laundry and to cook. This was time-saving with enabling me then to focus on the important tasks of my divorce. One son discovered he enjoyed cooking so much, that he got a degree in Culinary Arts and is a cook at a great restaurant.

Look At The Big Picture

What is it that you crave? Where do you see yourself heading In the near future? Next year? In five years?  Are you on the right path?  Lowering your stress level helps to get you out of the panic mode. When one is calmer, it is easier to set priorities. There are many avenues – homeopathic remedies, retreats, consulting a health professional etc. to decrease stress and anxiety.

When feeling overwhelmed and not being able to focus, discuss this with your solicitor. They have heard this before and can guide you in the right direction.

 

 

 

 

 

Co-parenting With a Difficult Ex: 5 Tips to Make It Easier

For a divorced parent, dealing with a difficult ex can be exhausting, emotionally draining, and damaging to the kids.

Co-parenting well is difficult enough with two happy parents. When your former partner, however, is non-understanding, the task seems impossible at times.

Here are the top 5 tips to be an effective co-parent

Set boundaries

Make sure you will not engage in negative communication or behavior with your ex. Simply, let your ex know that you will not discuss the matter in front of the children. Instead, ask your ex to send an email, providing it concerns a decision to be made about the children.

Although you cannot change the way your ex communicates with you, you can change the way you interact with your ex. Communicating through email dilutes the emotion.  When responding to emails, only address the specific issues concerning the children and ignore other irrelevant comments or accusations. Make sure to stick to the point, without judgment or criticism.

Do not criticize your ex

Keep your personal feelings about your ex aside and refuse to bad mouth your ex to your children. Also, do not engage in negative communication with family or friends, as your children might hear you.

Just like you do with your children, you need to resolve your battles with your ex. Find out which parenting issue is vital to you, where you can compromise, and where you are willing to let go.

Create a future plan

Putting all differences aside, try to sit down with your ex and create a plan that focuses on meeting the requirements of your children.  If required, ask a neutral or common party to be present to help you stay focused on the plan and even offer an objective opinion.

As part of your future plan, do discuss your new relationship goals as co-parents. Often, divorced couples fail to do this. Do not go like them, instead find out your relationship boundaries as co-parents to be, or look like.

Go unbiased

If you have issues with the way parenting is going, discuss it with your ex. Make sure to stay honest and give valid reasons to support your point of view. Be open to listening to your ex point of view as well. Maybe, you both hold different views but that does not mean one of you is right and the other is wrong. Co-parenting is not about winning for each other, it’s about focusing on the kids’ best interest.

Do not involve your kids

Never put your children in the position to help sort their parents’ issues. They should not be loaded with issues and circumstances that they cannot control.  As a parent, you might have to make sacrifices for your child’s happiness. Regardless of how another parent behaves, you need to take care of your actions, choices, and words. Simply, try to be your child’s role model by behaving appropriately at all times, and keeping your issues aside.

If you are going through the challenges of single parenting and are worried about the impact on children, do follow the above tips to make co-parenting easier.

Author Bio:

Willow Anderson Law is an Edina-based family law firm dedicated to guiding you through life-altering transitions while minimizing damage to your well-being, your children, and your financial future.We know how challenging family law matters like divorce, custody, and spousal/child support can be. That’s why our Minnesota family law firm is dedicated to attentive listening, straight-forward communication, and thoughtful advocacy on your behalf.