Is It Possible To Be Happy Again After A Divorce?
After a separation it’s quite common to wonder if you’ll ever bounce back and be happy again? Peter recalled “I felt so low I could hardly get out of bed, and all the things I used to enjoy, felt pointless. I asked myself if after this exhausting period I could ever be happy again?” Peter in fact found contentment some time after his divorce, although it wasn’t immediate, “It was really gradual. One big moment was noticing that I laughed and then I thought, “Hey, I can still find things funny!” and these moments just got more frequent”. But it’s not necessarily a linear process – there are ups and downs: “Some days I felt worse again, like when I found out that my ex was dating someone new, but overall things got better.” So what’s the secret to finding happiness after divorce? There is a lot of research about grieving and recovering from break-ups. Perhaps one of the best studies found from Stanford University . They found that how quickly you recovered depended on how many additional stressors you had in your life, and what coping strategies you had. It is hard to avoid some stressors but you can work on your coping strategies. What this study found about coping strategies was actually quite suprising. They found that talking about your problems could actually make things worse! Talking too much and repeatedly about how low you feel can lead to you focusing too much on this horrible time. Talking to people who you think do not understand what you are going through can also increase stress. It is important for people to know that the way they feel is normal but without focusing on their own expereince the whole time. This is why you should come to one of our…
Divorce: A New Financial Reality
Besides adjusting to a new emotional reality, divorce means accepting a new financial reality; and many people this means transitioning to a single income. According to the APA, around half of American marriages end in divorce so this is something a lot of us will face in our lifetimes. Unfortunately for many divorcees, particularly women, transitioning to a single income can feel like financial disaster: according to research from insurance provider Allianz two thirds of women feel their divorce created a financial crisis. Track your spending and anticipate future expenses At any point in your life, tracking your spending is a good habit to get into but especially so when your marriage is ending. Find out how much you spend on what. If you haven’t tracked your spending until now, use your credit card statements to estimate previous expenses. There are a variety of budgeting apps to help you do this. Once you know your current spending, you can estimate how much you will need to continue your current standard of living. This is a good first step in negotiating a settlement. Gather documentation Having the right financial records to hand early on in the divorce proceedings is very important. Correct documentation can help you avoid misunderstandings when reaching a settlement. Gathering documents can take longer than you think so start early. Particularly important are your checking and savings account statements, as well as statements from retirement and investment accounts. Health Many couples rely on the coverage of one partner’s health insurance plan, so divorce can create a lot of health questions. There should be a way for you to get some kind of health coverage in the transition period. If you are eligible for a legislation known as Cobra, you can get health insurance for 36 months on your spouse’s plan. In addition, one’s health insurance…
Divorce Rates in the UK Rise But Stay Well Below Their Peak
The year 2016 saw the number of divorces amongst opposite-sex couples rise by 5.8% to 106,959, although this is still about 30% off its 2003 peak of 153,065. When considering the reasons for this, three possibilities clearly stand out. Practical difficulties of divorcing Marriage is intended to be a lifelong commitment and exiting that commitment can lead to all kinds of expensive and challenging complications. While some of these could be reduced by the introduction of “no-fault” divorce, possibly together with a greater awareness of and clarity around pre-nuptial agreements (pre-nups), others are far more difficult to resolve. The most obvious example of this is the division of property and the practical consequences of dividing a household, many of which revolve around the fact that adults living as a couple can generally live more cheaply than two individuals living in their own homes. These difficulties can increase exponentially with the arrival of children, particularly in their pre-school years, when the need for childcare is at its greatest. Rise in cohabitation When couples cohabit outside of marriage, they can go their separate ways without having to enter into formal divorce proceedings but this has both advantages and disadvantages. On the one hand, it means that couples without children can simply agree to part company and move on, while couples with children can make their own arrangements for their future care and maintenance. On the other hand, when couples split on less-than-amicable terms, this can lead to difficulties in dividing assets fairly. For example, while there are certain situations in which a partner whose name is not on the deeds of a property may be held to have a “beneficial interest” therein, there are certain, specific, requirements to be met in order for this to be recognized, general help, financial or otherwise,…
Moving On After A Divorce Or Break Up
Moving on Mentally After A Divorce In the United States of America, a couple divorces every 13 seconds. Divorce has become a norm in our world today but this does not mean the process is any less painful or stressful. By the age of 50, more than 90 percent of Americans get married but almost half of them do not find their happily ever after. For some, it has been a long hard decision taken over months or years spent trying to make their relationship work. For others, it is swift and sometimes unexpected. So how do you move on from a divorce? Here are just a few tips to get you started. Accept & Let Go The first step to moving on from a divorce can be one of the hardest. It is facing the situation and acknowledging the end of your marriage. The period immediately after can be emotional and unpredictable; ranging from sadness over lost dreams to regrets and denial over your decision. It is completely okay to mourn the loss of your marriage. No one enters a marriage thinking they would like to get divorced. In fact, it is important that you let yourself feel the loss and come to terms with it. Grief is a natural reaction to loss. Reconnect with Yourself Whether it is through self-reflection, venting to a close friend or counselling, reconnect with your spiritual side. Begin by focusing on yourself. Banish any negative unwanted thoughts and look to defining your self-worth. Your marriage may be over but there are many positive things you may have to offer. Realize that your failed marriage does not define you. As you begin to find your true self again, a clear understanding of what you want and what makes you truly happy will help you move forward. Finally, self-reflection and…
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