
Get in Shape for Free: A Fitness Guide for Single Parents
Engaging in regular exercise is one of the smartest investments anyone can make, especially if you’re a single parent who needs the energy to keep up with her kids. And when we say “investment” we’re talking about time and effort, not money. To show you what we mean, here are several free (or almost free) ways to get in shape. Use these tips to give you the guidance and motivation you need to achieve your fitness goals. Stick With the Basics TV programs love to show images of people with big arms and sculpted abs. The purpose behind most of these promos is to sell you some kind of overpriced product, usually with the promise that it will turn you into a superhero. Sadly, the real world never works that way. Most home fitness machines end up as overpriced coat hangers or yard sale merchandise. So skip the gadgets and start with these four classic routines instead: Pushups. This one exercise can do you more good than all the fitness products on the market. It strengthens the arms, shoulders, chest, abs, and even the legs. Plus, it costs you nothing. You need only a small amount of space and the motivation to improve yourself. And don’t beat yourself up if you can’t do a standard push-up right away. There’s no shame in starting at the intermediate level by bending your knees. Soon you’ll be pumping them out with the best of ’em. Situps or leg raises. This exercise will bulk you up without draining your wallet. Some people have trouble doing sit-ups because of neck or back issues. If that sounds like you, then leg raises are a great alternative, according to the fitness experts at the New York Times. Squats/deep knee bends. Not only will this exercise give your…
Dealing with Vindictive Co-Parent
Divorce brings a whole new set of complications to parenting. Having to deal with an unreasonable or vindictive former spouse adds additional stress to the situation. It may not be possible to parent as a team and that is okay. Having a detailed Parenting Plan lessens the need to keep going back and forth on the small stuff. If anticipating that splitting up holidays will be a battle down the road, get that addressed in the Parenting Plan. Ours was very detailed which included the percent each parent paid for various medical, dental and other charges for our sons. My attorney also wrote an incredibly precise divorce decree, which was quickly approved by the other collaborative attorney. These actions enabled post-divorce life to go smoother. Be careful that the youngsters are not used as tools for revenge. One parent may try to limit or stop visitation from the other one. Having the shared time clearly spelled out in the Parenting Plan may prevent this behavior. If you are on the receiving end of calls stating that the kids are sick and cannot see you, react in a positive way in order to end this game playing. Reply “How kind of you to let me know, so I can be prepared. I’ll have some soup ready and pick them up with barf bags in the car.” A way to minimize conflict is not to give the other parent any ammunition. Be reliable, on time and bite your tongue if necessary to avoid criticizing them in front of the kids. Be cognizant of Parental Alienation which is when one parent attempts to turn the children against the other one. If you are the target, consider getting legal advice on how to proceed. Go ahead and correct any misconceptions (lies), such as “Mommy…
Keep Your Kids Involved In Your Move: You’ll Be Happier and So Will They
Everyone knows that moving is stressful, but did you know that it can be especially difficult for your children if you leave them out of the planning? Being involved in decision making, packing and unpacking can help them to feel more in control and ready for the change. Here’s how: Pack their room last and unpack it first in the new home. Stick to the old meal and bedtime routines throughout the move to give them a sense of familiarity. Hire movers – you will thank yourself and you’ll have more time to help your children. Include your kids in some decisions: decorations, new plates, which new park to visit first. Find child and pet care for moving day to alleviate stress. Involve the kids in unpacking so they feel more invested. Prepare them mentally but be prepared for anxiety – adjusting can take up to 6 months. Get them pumped about their new school by taking a tour or even walking or driving by. Help them create a memory book of the old house, school, neighborhood, friends, babysitter. Remember to practice self-care so that you’re on top of your game for your children. Now that you have some ideas of how to involve your kids in the planning process, make it fun. If it’s a game instead of a chore, everyone will enjoy it more and feel ready for the move. You will still be stressed, but much less so when everyone is pitching in to help. Author Alexis Hall is a single mom to three kids. She created SingleParent.info to provide support and advice for the many families out there with only one parent in the household. She works as an in-home health nurse. When she isn’t working or spending time with her kids, she enjoys running and hiking and…
Temper Your Expectations During Divorce Negotiations
TEMPER YOUR EXPECTATIONS A divorce attorney once told me that if both parties end divorce not feeling satisfied how the assets were split – then he knew it was fair. When one party is happy – then that person probably got a bigger piece of the pie. The key to divorce negotiations and the subsequent outcome, is to temper your expectations. Do not go to the table expecting to get exactly what you want, but rather be willing to compromise to get what is most precious to you. My lawyer stated that many clients could easily divide thousands of dollars in investments, yet nearly come to blows over the household goods. Some former couples engage in battle over personal property, not realizing that action prolongs their proceedings. The adage “Pick your battles” aptly applies to this situation. ARE EMOTIONS GETTING IN THE WAY OF ASSET DIVISION? Feelings such as sentimentality, are attached to material items and are not with money. Sort through your emotions to determine if it is the object itself, or the memory it represents which is causing you to quarrel over it. I wanted the watercolor portrait of our cat, which I had commissioned. I anticipated that my husband would choose this purely out of spite. I pointed out several other pieces that were more expensive, and would bring him more cash. He took those. The fact that I was willing to give up more, made it easier for him to back down and let me have the few that I really desired. When my husband saw that I was not going to get in a fight over things, he ended up taking less. As in a chess game, anticipate the opponent’s moves and use strategy. Sacrifice your queen (what you do not crave) to save the…
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