Travelling with Children Post-Divorce as a Single Parent
Travelling with children as a single parent can be challenging, however there are tricks to making it go smoother. If being used to having another adult helping out (your former spouse), consider enlisting a replacement. My mother was the “granny nanny” and accompanied my two sons and I on many of our global adventures. She escorted a tired child back to the ship or watched the boys play in a park while I hit a few shops. Select destinations according to the ages of the children. Wee ones enjoy playing in the sand and staying put in one place. A condo at a beach or cabin at a lake fills this need nicely. Older ones crave adventure or exploring ruins like Indiana Jones. Think about a place that would be enjoyable for every family member. For example, many families where I reside, go to Costa Rica. One can take a leisurely stroll in the rainforest with a toddler, or have teens zip-lining through it. There are beaches for relaxing and museums for culture. Amusement parks, such as Disneyland, satisfies kids of all ages. See what travel deals you can get to make trips more affordable. Several divorced parents advise going to all-inclusive resorts. The youngsters partake in fun sports or classes which enables mom or dad to have some free time. It is one price for food, lodging and many of the offered activities. My friend liked to take her two sons to a Club Med, some which have circus classes for children. While her boys were dangling from ropes or on the trapeze, she was sipping a rum cocktail on the beach. There are various travel companies which offer special tours for families. One has safaris to Africa where the youngsters meet with a chief to learn about tribal…
How to Ward off Loneliness When Single Again
One can feel lonely when going through a break up or the divorce process. You have lost your live-in companion and may be by yourself for the first time in your life. Some go from their parents’ house – to university – to the marital home. Perhaps you feel overwhelmed doing all the tasks that used to be split up between the both of you. There is less time to be with friends. The divorce process itself is time consuming and can leave one feeling drained. It is essential to stay in touch with friends when ending a long-term relationship to ward off feelings of loneliness. A quick cup of coffee with a pal is an energy booster and provides an opportunity to vent. Holding onto a grudge or hostile feelings can impact one’s well-being. Just as you schedule events into your agenda – do so for pleasurable activities. One can be among others, yet not have to interact if that is an issue. Go to a film or play so you are around people. Many tote their lap tops to coffee shops and do their own thing while not being isolated. Ways to Ward off Loneliness A great way to feel connected to people is through volunteering. Not only is one helping others who appreciate it (humans or animals) but it can boost self-worth which may have taken a hit during a turbulent marriage. You also meet and connect with other volunteers. I enjoy the camaraderie of being with other church members when serving refreshments after Mass. Consider joining groups for fun, fitness or mental stimulation. MeetUp.com is global with many special interest groups, including divorce ones. Join a book or running club to enjoy an activity with like-minded people. Go to festivals – one is in the…
Coping at Work When Going Through Divorce
There can be issues that arise on the job when going through divorce. For one thing, an individual may have to leave for divorce sessions or court dates. Consider scheduling mediation or collaborative meetings around lunch time or staying a bit later that day. See if your divorce professional has early morning slots so that your job is not impacted by absences. Inform your supervisor regarding your divorce, in case your emotions are more extreme or your interactions are a bit erratic at work. My two bosses gave me some leeway during this stressful time. It is a toss-up whether or not to tell your co-workers about your situation. The other female and I went out for lattes and I blew off some steam away from our place of employment. If you feel your work may be slipping a little – then consider confiding in a few trusted colleagues. They can proactively catch some mistakes or at least realize that this is a temporary condition. In some places, one may be the subject of gossip around the office. Many people pour themselves into their jobs for a much needed distraction. It can be one’s oasis of calm in the turbulent sea of divorce. Laughing and talking with my fun-loving co-workers helped me keep my sanity. Work projects and tasks keep minds focused and off divorce problems. Constantly checking one’s phone for messages takes time away from the job and thrusts one back into their divorce situation. Possibly look at texts or e-mail once during the work day, such as during lunch. I did not check anything at all while on the job and had my solicitor or her paralegal call me if something urgent arose. This gave me a break. Then when I got home, I dealt with divorce matters….
How to Deal with Worries During Divorce
There are a lot of emotions when going through the divorce process and one of them is worrying. Worry in itself is not bad – it is how one deals with it that can be a problem. When focusing on worry, it can be paralyzing, keeping us from getting needed tasks done. It can drain energy away from doing our day-to-day activities during proceedings. Worry alerts a person that all is not right in a situation. It is a call to action for making a change. There are ways to heed this call of action in a productive manner. When a worry is about a specific issue, write out a plan how to fix the problem or at least minimize any fall out. For example, if how assets may be spilt is causing you to lose sleep, then take some steps. If there is a chance some assets may be hidden, then bring a forensic accountant on board to search for off shore funds or money that may have been diverted to another party. You could hire an independent financial advisor to look over what is on the table and suggest which ones are in your best in your case. A person in their fifties may be more interested in retirement accounts than in other investments. One man in New York City took the bulk of his settlement in retirement funds and let his wife have their rent controlled apartment. He was then able to move in with his bachelor brother and feel secure about his golden years. Think about what is really bothering you so it can be addressed. This is the root cause of the worry, which may be something unexpected. I worried constantly about losing the marital home. After discussing this worry with others, I discovered that…
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