
When to Consider Divorce
Some people have said that they waited too long before divorcing, but I have yet to hear someone say they jumped the gun and initiated one too soon. There are many factors involved in determining if and when a divorce ought to commence. A main one seems to be regarding children and their ages. One man felt that he stayed seven years too long in his marriage, choosing to wait until the last child went off to uni. He stated that the love was gone and the marriage was dead – however he stayed because he wanted to see his kids every day. In hindsight, he thinks it harmed his sons witnessing coldness and disinterest between a married couple. Another stayed in an unhappy marriage since her husband was their sons’ Boy Scout troop leader. She thought the boys would feel more secure with both parents in the home. Eight years post-divorce her sons are still asking what took her so long to file for divorce. For those on the fence about whether to stay or go, The Divorce Magazine UK has a link to various resources that are invaluable in the pre-divorce period too. Maypole Women has resources as well for women and children in a potential divorce situation. Relate and Retrouvaille do marital counselling to see if the relationship can be repaired. There are instances when a line is crossed and one spouse chooses to exit the marriage quickly. For example, a lad let slip that his father was showing him and his brother internet porn. The woman confronted her husband who denied it, but she said that she was having it investigated. He left her right away and she filed for divorce a week later. No amount of counselling could have changed her opinion to stay in…
Go on a Christmas Cruise Post-Divorce
One way to start new Christmas traditions is to get away from it all and wipe the slate clean after divorce. No more “this was what we did when we were still married last Christmas Eve.” One happily divorced woman who is now my friend, went on a Christmas/New Year’s cruise solo. She chose to surround herself with many people and felt the Christmas spirit. Not needing a date to dance the night away on New Year’s Eve was a bonus. On cruises, there are often get-togethers for the single passengers of all ages. Beats moping around one’s flat when friends are occupied with their own holiday plans. Both my sons and I did two holiday cruises on Cunard’s QE2 with my husband and mother. Then just the three of us did two post- divorce ones on Holland America. What are holiday cruises like? The anticipation starts months ahead of time when selecting the destinations. The cruises are a nice mix of exploring other cultures during the day and consuming scrumptious meals on board while possibly being serenaded by a string quartet. It was a unique experience hearing a steel band in the Caribbean playing carols and seeing Gibraltar decked out in Christmas decorations. There are different types of entertainment – concerts, musicals, comedians, magic shows, plus much more. Other activities are lectures, cooking demonstrations, computer classes, quizzes, and bridge, just to mention a few. One can be sociable or chill out reading in a quiet corner. The kids are kept busy and the single parents get some alone time or to interact with other adults. The staff puts on a show and sings carols. The QE2 had a traditional British Christmas which included a hilarious pantomime. Holland America embraced its Dutch heritage with their special foods and celebrations. I…
Ways to Reduce Stress during Christmastime
Holidays stressing you out? Divorce is a time to start anew and a good excuse to notify others that one is simplifying their life. Divorce can be the catalyst to spend more holiday time with your children and less on making the party rounds or stressing out about getting through your holiday “to do” list. Below are 7 tips for reducing stress during the holidays: 1. Change your focus from a to-do-list to a let’s-have- fun-list. We check off some holiday activities as if they were chores. Scrap the list, start over, and decide what you and the children really want to do. Making seven kinds of cookies is deleted and baking loads of one kind, like gingerbread, makes the new list. Next year bake a different type or enlist family members to each make their favorite cookies and then share. 2. Decorating for Christmas is fun. Sipping hot cocoa while watching “Charlie Brown’s Christmas” and hanging ornaments on the tree is relaxing. The Christmas wonderland in your house is lovely, but contemplating putting away all of those baubles post-holiday, is not. Avoid that stress by this method. In January, have a fun place for lunch selected or a movie for a certain time. Enlist your little elves to gather the holiday decorations from around the house and put them in one place. Remove the tree decorations and box up everything for storage. It is almost a game at my house and we can get everything down, put away, and the naked tree outside, in one half hour. Then we go to our fun activity. No fuss or nagging. 3. Reduce holiday stress by telling people that since you are divorced, you are making some changes in your life. You are no longer buying presents for the extended family and…
Group Dating – How It Works
After a hiatus of a few decades – it is challenging to jump back into the dating scene post-divorce. Dating expectations have changed and our svelte figures have morphed into middle-aged bodies. There are a plethora of options in meeting potential mates which can be a bit overwhelming. What is a simple way to dip your toe into the dating pool without totally plunging in? Group Dating.
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